October 05, 2023

By Terry Allen

Texas Metro News

 

Lucille “Big Mama” Allen wanted us to know that no matter, if we were not being a servant to others then our own prosperity would be in default and personal benefits would fail. What I learned, for sure, is my being willing to help others is a positive trait that can lead to strong relationships and a sense of fulfillment. I also learned that reaching out to others may lighten your own burdens that have brought you grief.

I am the one who consistently reaches out to others and I do not refuse to help anyone even when I have limited and/or no resources at all. There are some strengths to you being “that person." You empower empathy. Your automatic behavior to help others demonstrates a high level of empathy and compassion. This allows you to connect with people on a deeper level and understand their struggles and needs.

You personify trust. Trust is the weakest link in BIPOC relationship rebuilding. By consistently offering your support and assistance, you have the opportunity to build trust filled relationships with others. Everyone will appreciate your willingness to intervene, and this builds a greater trust, loyalty, and a sense of belonging. Big Mama told me over and over again, “Your decision to help will a have a positive impact on the lives of those you pour into.”

Whether I am offering advice, lending money, or providing emotional support, my actions make a difference and change in people's lives. But the greatest benefit of helping others when you feel you “hit rock bottom” is you begin to know that GOD made the Rock, and he is just stopping you from falling into deeper despair. You begin to see that others may have it worse than you. Yet you also begin to rebuild your self-aware state of mind.

How, you ask? I learned to prioritize self-care! I begin to look out for my own physical, mental, and emotional well-being. I actually set boundaries and learn to say "no" so I could be ok. I learned that managing the emotional burden of helping others is essential to maintaining your own well-being. I learned to apply that empathy and compassion to my issues and challenges. My biggest gift was I learned how to reflect and debrief. OMG! How powerful was Big Mama with just her 6th grade education and her God-driven values instilled within me emotional resilience.

Have you hit rock bottom and gotten better when you helped someone else rise up? Email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and let me know.

Terry Allen is an award-winning media professional, journalist, and entrepreneur. He is also the founder of City Men Cook and 1016 Media. Reach him at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

Category: Opinion